Book-blogging: "The Amateur Marriage"

As per here, one of my 101 things is to read & blog 10 recommended books. I've just finished the first one, "The Amateur Marriage" by Anne Tyler, as recommended by mrs_leroy_brown.

It covers a couple's relationship, from meeting, to (fairly clearly ill-fated from the start) marriage, to kids, divorce, grandkids; and all the small things in between. Anne Tyler really is good at the small observations; you can see how and why things happen as they do, even if you can also see both how and why they might have happened otherwise.

The telling of things from different angles shows how the people involved construct their own views of themselves and each other, and how those different angles put a different meaning on their failure to meet (to be able to meet?) each other on any middle ground. Their post-divorce relationships also show up the extent to which they've constructed themselves around the other and that relationship - reacting against it but not considering what they did get out of it (and people do get things out of any relationship, however dysfunctional - in some cases because of the dysfunction).

I found it saddening, because of the lack of awareness shown - the ways in which people react to and against their surroundings without acknowledging that they're doing it (or sometimes acknowledging it but not thinking further about what that means), the ways in which they, deliberately or otherwise, rewrite their past, the ways in which they fail to meet, the ways in which they deceive. There's an implication of inevitability about it all.

But it's also fascinating, and sufficiently well-observed that it does construct things believably. (Which is of course also depressing.) I'd second Bec's recommendation that it's worth reading.

Book-blogging: "The Amateur Marriage"

As per here, one of my 101 things is to read & blog 10 recommended books. I've just finished the first one, "The Amateur Marriage" by Anne Tyler, as recommended by mrs_leroy_brown.

It covers a couple's relationship, from meeting, to (fairly clearly ill-fated from the start) marriage, to kids, divorce, grandkids; and all the small things in between. Anne Tyler really is good at the small observations; you can see how and why things happen as they do, even if you can also see both how and why they might have happened otherwise.

The telling of things from different angles shows how the people involved construct their own views of themselves and each other, and how those different angles put a different meaning on their failure to meet (to be able to meet?) each other on any middle ground. Their post-divorce relationships also show up the extent to which they've constructed themselves around the other and that relationship - reacting against it but not considering what they did get out of it (and people do get things out of any relationship, however dysfunctional - in some cases because of the dysfunction).

I found it saddening, because of the lack of awareness shown - the ways in which people react to and against their surroundings without acknowledging that they're doing it (or sometimes acknowledging it but not thinking further about what that means), the ways in which they, deliberately or otherwise, rewrite their past, the ways in which they fail to meet, the ways in which they deceive. There's an implication of inevitability about it all.

But it's also fascinating, and sufficiently well-observed that it does construct things believably. (Which is of course also depressing.) I'd second Bec's recommendation that it's worth reading.

Doing the right thing anyway

I liked this post.

I also like these instructions for self-watering plantpots, except that I don't want to buy a stack of plastic boxes in order to get more containers for the balcony. I do want to be a bit less erratic with the balcony-gardening this year, though.

Doing the right thing anyway

I liked this post.

I also like these instructions for self-watering plantpots, except that I don't want to buy a stack of plastic boxes in order to get more containers for the balcony. I do want to be a bit less erratic with the balcony-gardening this year, though.